Hubby Home!!!!

After 7 days of quarantining, John finally came home yesterday and a big shout out to so many friends who made it possible. My army of warriors who came to be with me just blew me away with their continuous gift of time. Saturday night Lynn stayed the night and she cooked, cleaned, sang and prayed with and over me and I’m speechless at all you beautiful humans whom I love so dearly to have been there for me!!

As soon as John came home I spent as much time with him as possible and we relaxed, napped, cuddled, ran a couple errands, went for a gator ride in our woods and watched a movie. It was a sweet time and I’m glad he’s home. 

While I felt good yesterday, I admit I had a little melt down or a Garden moment as I call them. Jesus was in the Garden of Gethsemane when He said, “Father, if you are willing, please take this cup of suffering away from me. Yet I want your will to be done, not mine.” ~Luke 22:42. While we watched the movie in bed, I changed positions and my sternum started aching, my breathing felt shallow and restricted and it reminded me that while I believe I am healed, my body is still catching up. The feeling of grief I felt was all of a sudden all-consuming and I “hooked into it’, as Lynn explained to me. I wept. I asked, “Why, Lord?”, I told John that I didn’t want this and that I HAD to get better!! My muffled sobs and streaming tears were comforted by a gentle back rub and kisses on my head by a loving and grieving husband. He prayed over me after wiping away my tears and I fell asleep in his arms. This is why I didn’t blog last night. 

But today is a new day and full of new mercies. I want the joy and faith of a child that I’m believing in my Heavenly Father for the good gifts He is always lavishing on me. Here is my little friend, Zoey reminding me of the possibility of joy even when I feel sad as she modeled a fascinator hat I gave her from the Derby. 

Her Dad, and our friend Jake Cass, continues to bless us by cutting the grass at John’s shop which gives John and me that precious gift of time!! Thank you again and again, Jake! Her mama and sister had just read Psalm 27 to me when I snapped this precious screenshot. I must say the Word was so very on point as Liz and LilyMae read it. It might just be one of my new favorites. “The Lord is my light and my salvation— so why should I be afraid? The Lord is my fortress, protecting me from danger, so why should I tremble? When evil people  (cancer) comes to devour me, when my enemies and foes  (disease and illness) attack me, they will stumble and fall. Though a mighty army (of cancer cells) surrounds me, my heart will not be afraid. Even if I am attacked, I will remain confident. The one thing I ask of the Lord — the thing I seek most— is to live in the house of the Lord all the days of my life, delighting in the Lord’s perfections and meditating in his Temple. For he will conceal me there when troubles come; he will hide me in his sanctuary. He will place me out of reach on a high rock. Then I will hold my head high above my enemies (cancer) who surround me. At his sanctuary I will offer sacrifices with shouts of joy, singing and praising the Lord with music. Hear me as I pray, O Lord. Be merciful and answer me! My heart has heard you say, “Come and talk with me.” And my heart responds, “ Lord, I am coming.” Do not turn your back on me. Do not reject your servant in anger. You have always been my helper. Don’t leave me now; don’t abandon me, O God of my salvation! Even if my father and mother abandon me, the Lord will hold me close. Teach me how to live, O Lord. Lead me along the right path, for my enemies (cancer cells) are waiting for me. Do not let me fall into their hands. For they accuse me of things I’ve never done; with every breath they threaten me with violence. Yet I am confident I will see the Lord’s goodness while I am here in the land of the living. Wait patiently for the Lord. Be brave and courageous. Yes, wait patiently for the Lord.”

Psalm 27:1-14 NLT