At 2 am I woke up feeling overwhelmed. Noticing I still have restricted breathing, albeit is improved, and knowing I’ve completed one of two antibiotics, I was thinking that my breathing should feel much more normal if this is just pneumonia. Since it’s really not feeling as improved as I expected, my mind raced to all those places of fear. Thankfully I rolled over and asked my sweet hubby to just hold me while I cried. He did and he prayed over me while rubbing my back. He helped divert my emotional rollercoaster by asking me to tell him all about my walk in the woods with my mom last evening.
Most of the time since Wednesday morning’s findings I’ve been in a place of faith and trust and hope but sometimes I get scared too. Scared I’ll die. Scared I would be leaving behind so many loved ones that will have to grieve deeply my loss. Then after a good cry, I calmed down and thanked God for being there with me through it all. I thanked him for the beautiful full moon. I thanked him for a faithful and adoring husband. I thanked him for the overwhelming outpouring of love and support I’ve experienced in just 4 days!
I decided not to go to church right now with so many people and possible exposure to any illness. Even though I don’t have COVID, I need to protect my lungs and have less exposure to so many people until this is figured out.
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