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Wednesday, August 10, 2016

Day 95 and 96 Feeling Good, Feeling God, And Got Medical News

So for the past 2 days, I've been mostly on hiatus from constantly looking at Facebook! What a relief! If I see one more post about Trump vs Hillary, I think I'll faint from exhaustion!

 I have enjoyed reading my Bible again and have found several Scriptures encouraging and refreshing to keep my mind thinking of something worth my time.  Monday morning I read Psalm 86. It starts in a way that is raw and real and often how I feel and how one of my dearest friends is feeling now too.

Psalm 86:1-7 Bend down, O Lord, and hear my prayer; answer me, for I need your help. Protect me, for I am devoted to you. Save me, for I serve you and trust you. You are my God. Be merciful to me, O Lord, for I am calling on you constantly. Give me happiness, O Lord, for I give myself to you. O Lord, you are so good, so ready to forgive, so full of unfailing love for all who ask for your help. Listen closely to my prayer, O Lord; hear my urgent cry. I will call to you whenever I’m in trouble, and you will answer me.

Thankfully I am mentally feeling more like myself  post #4 chemo treatment and I could actually crack open a book without my brain screaming to put it down! I read the book of Titus yesterday and was encouraged that God really knows what He is talking about! When I read this:

1:15 Everything is pure to those whose hearts are pure. But nothing is pure to those who are corrupt and unbelieving, because their minds and consciences are corrupted. 16 Such people claim they know God, but they deny him by the way they live. They are detestable and disobedient, worthless for doing anything good.

I thought, hmmm I can think of a couple folks that fit  that description..on both sides,  the pure and the corrupt.  Thanks for the reminder of why some people are the way  they are! Not my problem, regardless of how they treat me, or ignore me.

 Then I read this:

2:4 These older women must train the younger women to love their husbands and their children, to live wisely and be pure, to work in their homes,[b] to do good, and to be submissive to their husbands. Then they will not bring shame on the word of God. In the same way, encourage the young men to live wisely. And you yourself must be an example to them by doing good works of every kind. Let everything you do reflect the integrity and seriousness of your teaching.

God has placed several young people in our lives to 'do life with'. We feel so blessed and useful in God's kingdom because we can share experiences in life and how He has taught us and now we can pass along that wisdom to others. I wonder how my cancer experience will someday encourage others. I know it already has and will continue to do so, cuz that's just the way God works. Our cup runneth over!

As of today, I have spent most of my day chasing doctors. Thankfully, I have great news. Remember that weird burning, tightness in my throat that I've had off and on for 3 months? Well I finally saw Dr. Ernest Manders at Christ Hospital and he scoped my throat and found nothing. He really had no reason as to why but said it's probably like I said, neurological as a result of the shock of knowing I was diagnosed with cancer. I read today in a book given to me by one of our guests at Dr. Henize's, that people who have cancer diagnoses often can have PTSD side effects. Hmmm, never knew that, but it would make sense. The other great news is the why to my question of having blood in my stool. What fun this is! If a girl knows how to have fun, it's me! First, I get an 18 inch camera tube wiggled through my nose and into my throat, and then I get to have a colon rectal surgeon 'check me out' and found the culprit for my bleeding. Cancer treatment can really mess up one's 'regularity'. My body can't figure out whether it wants to have diarrhea or constipation, so I get to help it with this little pill or that little pill and in doing so, my body is sick and tired of it all and decided to tear or fissure and now my new menu includes psillium and lots more water! For regularity, ya know! Well, I admit, I am thankful that the last doc got me in today cuz I literally called his office at 11:15 am and they got me in at noon! Thanks, God! It truly was a gift to have gotten that over and done with.

Now, off to grocery shopping with my amazingly, sweet and doting (slightly overprotective) hubby!


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